Why Bernie Madoff, not Rush Limbaugh, should be made the face of the G.O.P.

The simplest breakdown of America's 2 major political parties is this: The Republicans blame the poor for all our problems, while the Democrats blame the rich. When the poor are seen by the public-at-large as the culprits, the Repubs do well, like in 1994 when "welfare queens" got all the blame for our economic ills. Right now the Democrats are coming off of 2 straight electoral ass-whoopings and are enjoying a huge identification advantage over the G.O.P. Why? Well, George W. Bush for one. Also, there are now more poor people than rich people, and that super rich Ponzi-scheming bastard Bernie Madoff is Public Enemy #1.

Look, as long as that fat fuck Limbaugh is still breathing he'll be saying stupid shit, that's not news. So Operation Rushbo may be a success so far for President Obama, but as long as the face of this financial crisis is a super-rich crook like Madoff, the rich will be (rightly) blamed for this recession and the Democrats will be sitting pretty.

oh thank god! religions losing influence in the U.S.

The mind-fuck that is religion is losing influence in America, so says a nearly year-long study of 55,000 Americans. Some interesting findings:

"Fifteen percent of respondents said they had no religion, an increase from 14.2 percent in 2001 and 8.2 percent in 1990, according to the American Religious Identification Survey."

That is great, but that growth has slowed since that 6 point jump from 1990-2001. Pretty odd, considering that since that time we have had the Catholic Church pedophilia scandal and the 9/11 attacks, and if those haven't made you question the corruption and extremism borne out of religion nothing will. It's a sham, all of it! It also just gives people a handy excuse for their bigotry (hello, Prop. 8!).

"Catholics grew to about one-third of the adult population in California and Texas, and one-quarter of Floridians, largely due to Latino immigration, according to the research."

no surprise here. us latinos are a stubborn and superstitious bunch.

"And, since 1990, a slightly greater share of respondents — 1.2 percent — said they were part of new religious movements, including Scientology, Wicca and Santeria."

I had no idea Scientologists were so small a denomination. Are they all in Hollywood?

"The study found that the percentage of Americans who identified themselves as Muslim grew to 0.6 percent of the population, while growth in Eastern religions such as Buddhism slightly slowed."

wtf? the super-violent religion that is Islam grew substantially while the super-peaceful religion that is Buddhism did not? if you need any more evidence we live in a fucked up, upside-down world....

"the study found that the numbers of Americans with no religion rose in every state."

God Bless America!

Jon & Kate= Over?

If you've ever seen TLC's "Jon & Kate plus Eight" you've seen poor Jon Gosselin having to deal w/ 8 kids plus his soul-sucking shrew of a wife, Kate. Well now comes word that Jon is stepping out, and all I can say is GO FOR IT JON! Don't let that bitch grind you down anymore than she already has! Cheat! Cheat! Cheat like you've never cheated before! Now I normally don't approve of cheating, seeing how I've been cheated on (long story) though I've also been a cheatee (longer story, err, stories), but that's neither here nor there, just take a look at Kate in action in one of many examples and you'll understand why I'm on Team Jon here (oh and Jon if you are on the d.l., email me!):

the completely awesome MLB 2K9 Tim Lincecum ad

including a gratuitous shot of my dream man's hot back tatt. damn when is baseball starting already?!?!

Obama Cabinet Least Valuable Player: Tim Geithner

From his tax problems to the disastrous rollout of his "bank plan" to his keeping mum while the markets plummet back to 19fucking97 levels, it's clear that Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner has lost whatever little confidence the public had in him from the start. Hell, even his predecessor Hank Paulson was a better communicator than this guy! President Obama, can you dump this douche already?

Rush Limbaugh & Michael Steele= Cartman & Token!

"oh please forgive me, Massa Limbaugh!"

Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele says he has reached out to Rush Limbaugh to tell him he meant no offense when he referred to the popular conservative radio host as an “entertainer” whose show can be “incendiary.”

“My intent was not to go after Rush – I have enormous respect for Rush Limbaugh,” Steele said in a telephone interview. “I was maybe a little bit inarticulate. … There was no attempt on my part to diminish his voice or his leadership.”

Isn't this fun? I love seeing the racists, misogynists, homophobes and creationists that make up the base of the G.O.P. purge the party of anyone who isn't a fellow portly, caucasian, heterosexual male who has sex with his wife twice a year (if he's lucky). In other words, the party has no room for anyone other than Rush and his minions, which is great, seeing how Rush's popularity is approaching O.J. levels. The G.O.P. suicide spiral is full speed ahead!

good luck getting laid in college talking like this, kid.....

13 year-old wonder-boy author Jonathan Krohn spoke at the 2009 Conservative Political Action Conference on Friday and received a standing ovation from the chubby, balding and pale crowd of Republicans. You know your party has it bad when your most eloquent voice hasn't even finished puberty yet! Oh well, at least he can't vote for 5 more years, and by then he may be the only 18-year-old Republican in the country. Enjoy your time out in the wilderness, G.O.P., couldn't happen to a better bunch of bigots!

I got crowned today....

yup, a new porcelain bicuspid for the low low price of $559! imagine the cost if I DIDN'T have dental insurance! anyways, to mark this head-banging (against the wall) occasion I present to you "David After Dentist- the Metal version":

The Blair Douchebag Project

Seems a fringe student group at NYU decided to "occupy" a campus cafeteria in order to combat capitalist tyranny, errr, or something. Watch the final hilarious minutes here as some idiot protester (who doesn't even go to NYU haha) tapes the cops simply walking through the barricades and telling them them to get the fuck out! Way to take a stand against "The Man", fellas. Sit back, take a sip of some "corporate water" and enjoy this priceless comedy gem:


Ha! Tiananman Square it's not!