so proud of the President!

This is a great, historic day! Fuck the right-wing religious bigots! Obama 2012!

I can't quit you, gay jacket!

Hillary has our back!

Separated at birth?

Olympic Champion Evan Lysacek & Jack Skellington

Toss out the Nazi rat Pope!

Awww nothing makes me happier than to see the Catholic Church exposed for the racket it is! You see the church has had a bad run this month, first the homophobic institution was caught up in a gay male prostitution scandal, then one-time Hitler Youth member Pope Benedict XVI himself, then known as Cardinal Joseph RATzinger, was discovered to have protected a pedophile priest in Wisconsin who may have molested over 200 deaf boys, and now the child molestation scandals are spreading to Ireland, Germany, Austria and beyond.

The Pope is doubling-down, if you will, by dismissing the scandals as nothing more than "petty gossip". Well good luck with that, your ass-holiness! There are now calls on you to resign and your approval ratings are dropping faster than an altar boy's gown in a confessional!

As a former Catholic, I agree the rat pope should be thrown out on his ass and the whole church investigated and prosecuted the same way we do the mafia! But if nothing changes (as is likely) perhaps this is the only way to protect kids in Catholic churches:

my own Drunken Hookup Failure!

In honor of Deadspin's series on Drunken Hookup Failures, I thought I would enlighten you guys with one (out of many!) of my own, which happened just last Summer, so here we go (NOTE: not for the easily offended!):

OK, so I meet this guy online and we agree to meet at a local gay bar. We've been talking for awhile, he's Mexican, in his mid-20's, kinda short and while he's not really my type he's cute enough and seems like a cool guy. So we have some drinks and hang out for awhile and he suggests we go back to his place. I'm like ok, so we go back to his apartment, where it turns out he lives with his Grandma, who's lounging on the couch in the family room in her robe watching TV.  Well if you know anything about Mexican Grandmas (I had 2), they are a notoriously tough bunch, and as soon as I walk in the apartment she gives me the evil eye! I know that eye well! The guy tells Granny to go to her room and she does, but not before giving me a scowl and that evil eye once again.  I excuse myself to go take a piss and when I turn on the bathroom light I see roaches scatter! Ugh that bathroom was so fucking nasty!   I put the seat up w/ my foot and piss, then get the hell out of there and back to the family room.   The guy doesn't have a room of his own so he has rolled out the sofa bed and we lay down.  We start to make out and I notice his hygiene isn't all great, which I can understand a little cuz it was 100 degrees that day and that night was hot as hell too, but, shit, homeboy stunk!  But I'm drunk and horny enough so I go along with it.   So we are making out, clothes start to come off and he's fully erect, but it's taking me awhile to get there cuz I'm a lil grossed out by the roaches and hygiene, but I finally get hard and grab my bag to get a condom when I hear a noise in the hallway!  OMG I thought, Grandma is watching us!  I grab a sheet and cover myself and tell him to go check the hallway. He does, and no one is there, but I'm positive it was a door I heard!   Anyways, when he comes back to the sofabed, I am no longer erect!  The Grandma in the hallway, imagined or not, was the third strike after the roaches and hygiene, and my dick is limp as fuck!  He tries sucking on it and playing with my balls for awhile, but nothing!   It won't budge!  He asks "Is it me?"  I'm like, of course not, it must be all the booze I had, uh, yeah, that's it, the booze!  So that was that.  He tells me let's just go to sleep. I want to leave but I'm still too buzzed to drive all the way home, so I pretend I'm asleep for about 4 hours, holding in my pee and listening for Grandma in the hallway!  I snuck out at about 5:30 in the morning, humiliated and hungover and never heard from the guy again.....

Hookup FAIL!

----------Heartbreak!----------

Congrats to Canada for winning the gold in a tournament and title game that had to be the best in Olympic history. Hot ass Zach Parise and cute little Ryan Miller looked so sad after losing the game I would have gladly consoled them in any way I could! But Team USA has a lot to be proud of, as does Brian Burke, who put the team together and came to Vancouver just days after burying his son Brendan, a young gay-rights advocate who tragically died in an auto accident at the age of 21.

Overall, a pretty damn good Olympic games!

and now my Top 10 in film....

1) The Lord of The Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
2) Brokeback Mountain
3) Gladiator
4) The Dark Knight
5) Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for make benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
6) Dreamgirls
7) The 40 Year-Old Virgin
8) Moulin Rouge!
9) Lost in Translation
10) Kill Bill Vol. I

ABC can suck a nut!

soooo lemme get this straight, a racy performance by hot-ass Adam Lambert at like 10:50 PM at night on ABC is grounds for him to be dumped by the network for other performances, not once, not twice, but now 3 times? This is absurd! This network will allow the fame-whoring, mentally-unbalanced, sick-fuck Henne family on "Wife Swap" twice, and has a reality show called "Wipeout" which violently batters around it's contestants and may have contributed to the death of one, but Adam Lambert crosses the line? This homophobia plain-and-simple, ABC, I call BULLSHIT! Get your priorities straight you allegedly murdererous bigots!
Keep it edgy, Adam! Fuck ABC!

how goddamned great is 'Glee'?!

Just words.......

President Barack Obama is speaking at the Human Rights Campaign's 13th annual national dinner tonight, sucking up to all the rich homos who are all too glad to empty their wallets just to stand in the presence of our "fierce advocate" in the White House. Only problem is, Obama hasn't done jack shit for our community. Oh sure, a smattering of benefits here, a nice speech and photo op there, but hey, enough with the scraps already! We want action, Mr. President! You can keep your word and get the ball rolling on ending discrimination against us by issuing a stop-loss order to suspend the discharges of gays and lesbians from the military at ANY MOMENT! But no, you choose to just kick that can down the road some more. So give your speech, Mr. President, mesmerize the audience of those house faggots with that magically eloquent teleprompter of yours, but until you actually do something substantive about DADT, Mr. Prez, then YES, you are just words- and your words don't matter, because so far, your word is shit!

Palin not under fire from the feds?

So says the L.A. Times. So WTF? Is she really planning to run for President? On what record?

On 2.5 years of experience as the Governor of a cash-flush state with no real problems?

If the economy is still shitty and unemployment is over 10% when 2012 comes around, there's no doubt Obama will be vulnerable. But no way in hell voters would gamble our future on another charismatic politician w/ a flimsy resume. Mitt "I fix businesses" Romney would be the smart choice to take on Obama if that is the case.

On her Jerry Springer-ish "family values"?

Bill Clinton's seedy personal history had to be in the back of some primary voters minds when choosing between Obama and my candidate of choice, Hillary Clinton. Would voters choose to quadruple down on First Family Drama by housing the freak-show Palin brood at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue? Fuck no!

On her flimsy education and even flimsier intellect?

Voters are in no mood for another retard republican president so soon after Dumbya.....

On her tits and legs?

They can't stay that nice and firm forever!

So what's left for Sarah? Fox News? A reality show to follow Octo-Mom's? Ooooh how about a politcal edition of "The Surreal Life"?! Sarah, Todd and Bristol Palin thrown in a house with Eliot Spitzer, David Vitter, Mark Foley, Mark Sanford, Barney Frank, John Ensign, Larry Craig, Jim McGreevey, Rod Blagojevich and an assorted mix of prostitutes, interns, Argentinian sluts, gay staffers, Ponzi schemers, bathroom stalls and adult diapers!

March of the Sick Fucks

a sick scene took place in Oakland, CA yesterday, as 60 people marched to honor a cop killer and rapist of a 12-year old girl:

"OPD you can't hide - we charge you with genocide," chanted the demonstrators as they marched along MacArthur Boulevard, near the intersection with 74th Avenue where Mixon, 26, a fugitive parolee, gunned down two motorcycle officers who had pulled him over in a traffic stop. He killed two more officers who tried to capture him where he was hiding in his sister's apartment nearby.

What the fuck is wrong with these people? To taunt the police force as they are mourning four of their own is just as bad as the Westboro Baptist Church members protesting the funerals of our brave soldiers because *gasp* America doesn't execute all gays. It's ridiculous, pointless and evil, plain and simple. May these asshole marchers join their hero cop killer/rapist in hell very soon!