Showing posts with label Crimes and Misdemeanors. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Crimes and Misdemeanors. Show all posts

Monday, February 13, 2012

hey GOP guess what?


this contraception controversy isn’t gonna help the GOP at all in the 2012 general election, in fact it will probably hurt. Many single women are independent voters and don’t want sexless creepy old men in robes trying to keep contraception from them, they’ll run to Obama and he will win.

Besides after the Catholic Church Child Molestation scandal of the past decade, the Catholic Church is hardly a moral authority anymore now is it?

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Who MUST President Obama fire?

OK, a loss of 60-plus seats in the House and 6 Senate seats is a disaster.  Luckily the teabaggers threw up certified lunatics like Joe Miller, Sharron Angle, Ken Buck and Christine O'Donnell and incompetents like Carly Fiorina and Dino Rossi or the Senate would be gone too.  Let's be real: President Obama is significantly if not mostly to blame for this "shellacking".  Although not alone that is, for there are incompetents in his cabinet who are letting not just him but the American people down.  After the 2006 midterms when the GOP was pummeled and lost both houses of Congress, at least President George W. Bush did one right thing and fired the incompetent Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, who had been overseeing 2 failing wars (that are still failing but that's a whole other diary).  Yet 3 weeks after the bloodbath and President Obama has not made ONE substantive staffing move.  I believe a bold move MUST be done to show that the White House is listening to the will of the people.  So why don't we help him along?  Here's a few names I wouldn't shed any tears over:

How about Timothy Geithner?  This should be a no-brainer.  He should have been dropped for consideration for the job that includes head of the I.R.S. once it came out that he couldn't even manage to do his own damn taxes right.  2 years later and the sailing has been just as rough.  Why is the stock market flush with cash but unemployment still sky-high?  Why are there huge bonuses going out to execs of taxpayer-money hoarding corporations but very little hiring or lending going on? 

How about offshore oil-drilling shill Ken SalazarRolling Stone makes the best case as to why Interior Secretary Salazar's hands are dirty when it comes to the BP oil spill (the whole article is a must-read):

Though he criticized the actions of "a few rotten apples" at the agency, he left long-serving lackeys of the oil industry in charge. "The people that are ethically challenged are the career managers, the people who come up through the ranks," says a marine biologist who left the agency over the way science was tampered with by top officials. "In order to get promoted at MMS, you better get invested in this pro-development oil culture." One of the Bush-era managers whom Salazar left in place was John Goll, the agency's director for Alaska. Shortly after, the Interior secretary announced a reorganization of MMS in the wake of the Gulf disaster, Goll called a staff meeting and served cake decorated with the words "Drill, baby, drill."


How about Homeland Security head Janet Napolitano?  The new TSA screening guidelines are a traveler's (and public relations) nightmare.  Why didn't her department adequately prepare the public for the new procedures?  She hasn't made the case and the result is that the TSA is a laughingstock and enraging more people every day.  This was hardly her first misstep either.

How about Eric Holder?  Was it really necessary to blast America as a "nation of cowards" when first assuming the job as Attorney General?  Beyond that controversial first-impression are his decisions to hold a civil trial for Khalid Sheikh Mohammed in New York City and the recent failure of his Justice department to convict Ahmed Ghailani on more than 1 count out of more than 280.  Whether or not you think civilian terrorist trials are a good idea there's little doubt that Holder's leadership in these matters hardly inspires confidence.

Then there's Press Secretary Robert Gibbs, the genius who decided to blast the "professional left", you know the BASE that helped push Obama over the edge in the 2008 primaries, shortly before the mid-terms when it was clear that turnout would be key.  Heckuva job there.

So who should go?  I vote all of the above.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Heckuva job, Arizona


Arizona's draconian new immigration law has already led to a case of racial profiling of an American-born citizen. A Mexican-American born in Fresno was detained until his wife went all the way to Arizona to take him his birth certificate. I was born in the San Joaquin Valley and I'm latino, just like this guy. So I can be thrown in jail and detained in Arizona if I don't have my birth certificate. Does that sound like America to you? That sounds like a motherfucking police state, like North Korea or China to me.

This law is un-American and unconstitutional, but how much you wanna bet the Teabaggers don't protest it? Noooo, they'd rather protest against non-existent things like "death panels" and "FEMA concentration camps". When their corporate overlords like Dick Armey or media masters like Rush, Beck and Palin don't tell them what to do, these dunces are totally lost and unable to form their own opinions. They have never protested Wall Street for crashing the economy either!

I'd trade in the Teabaggers for the illegal immigrants anyday!

Monday, March 29, 2010

Toss out the Nazi rat Pope!

Awww nothing makes me happier than to see the Catholic Church exposed for the racket it is! You see the church has had a bad run this month, first the homophobic institution was caught up in a gay male prostitution scandal, then one-time Hitler Youth member Pope Benedict XVI himself, then known as Cardinal Joseph RATzinger, was discovered to have protected a pedophile priest in Wisconsin who may have molested over 200 deaf boys, and now the child molestation scandals are spreading to Ireland, Germany, Austria and beyond.

The Pope is doubling-down, if you will, by dismissing the scandals as nothing more than "petty gossip". Well good luck with that, your ass-holiness! There are now calls on you to resign and your approval ratings are dropping faster than an altar boy's gown in a confessional!

As a former Catholic, I agree the rat pope should be thrown out on his ass and the whole church investigated and prosecuted the same way we do the mafia! But if nothing changes (as is likely) perhaps this is the only way to protect kids in Catholic churches:

Friday, February 19, 2010

what the hell was that?


What a bizarre spectacle that was! Those hideous curtains, that Nike-approved statement, that crowd that was there to, uh, do what exactly? Cheer him on? He looked like he was doing a eulogy- no doubt for his lost endorsements!

That robotic defense of Elin: "She deserves praise, not blame" was definitely the fakest moment, and still begs the question "exactly what the fuck happened that night??!!!" because the questions and media speculation will never end until he answers for the Thanksgiving night turn-of-events that started all this. Were you guys fighting? Where were you going? Where were your shoes? Why did you crash? And most importantly why did you turn the cops away? so no Tiger, I'm not buying your bullshit, like all cheaters you are just sorry you got caught, and if Tiger is a sex addict for banging hot every hot piece-of-ass he could then so is every other man I know!

Apology FAIL!

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Welcome to Vaticanistan......


....where simply being a pot-smoking, sexually active American can get you 26 years in prison.

Nice fucking justice system you got there, Italy! You take a blind eye to the cover-ups orchestrated by former Hitler Youth Pope Rat-zinger, leader of the pedophile-factory called the Catholic Church, but young American college student Amanda Knox is vilified by the media and convicted, let's face it, for her "heathen" lifestyle and the fact that she "exhibited odd behavior" after her roommate was brutally murdered... hello?!? It's called being in SHOCK! Typical fucking judgmental Catholic thinking! She partakes in sinful acts like pre-marital sex and drug use and doesn't immediately mourn in a good Catholic manner, so she MUST be capable of murder, right?!?

No DNA? No physical evidence? No witnesses? No plausible motive? No history of violence? NO PROBLEM! Italy's got your conviction right here, bada-bing bada-boom!

Well fuck that and fuck you, Italy!
FREE AMANDA KNOX!

Friday, July 31, 2009

>>>>>Beers and Bullshit<<<<<


Yesterday was all kumbaya blah blah bullshit between Harvard Professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. and Cambridge Police Sergeant James Crowley at the White House with President Obama over beers (hey, isn't it nice not to have a dry-drunk prez like that asshole Bush?), but excuse me, why the fuck hasn't Crowley been fired? This douchebag arrested a man on the front porch of the house he owns and pays taxes on, all because he didn't like what he was saying! It's outrageous!

Even more outrageous: the so-called conservatives on the right-wing blogs defending Crowley's actions. These "get the government out of our lives!" folks really have no problem with the government (Crowley) throwing a citizen in jail for expressing his right to free speech (Gates)? What is this, motherfucking China? North Korea? This is not a police state! This is the United States of America! If you wanna tell a cop in your house to go fuck his mama you have every right to do so without being hauled off in handcuffs!

But I shouldn't be surprised the faux-conservatives in the G.O.P. are siding against Gates, because all black men are criminals in their minds.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Crazy Bitches Be Busting Loose!

ok so July looks like "Crazy Cunt Month" all of a sudden! Let's survey the recent damage shall we?

Former QB Steve McNair shot in the head as he slept by crazy 20 y.o. Iranian slut!

Boxer Arturo Gatti allegedly strangled by crazy drunk wife with a purse strap!

Sarah Palin resigns as Alaska governor, vows to campaign for... Democrats!?

Ghost of child allegedly whispering to Octo-Mom while she takes a shit!

Gay Penguin couple broken up by conniving female whore penguin!

When will the madness end?!?!?

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

>>>>>>>R.I.P. Jacko<<<<<<<


For the record, I don't think he was a pedophile. I mean, those people usually have tons of kiddie porn in their house, on their computers, everywhere, but nothing that incriminating was ever found at Neverland. A celebrity like Michael Jackson, constantly around kids, would have had hundreds and hundreds of victims. He had a few accusers with money-grubbing parents, that's it, and was rightfully cleared of all charges in court. He was fucking stupid to keep letting little kids sleep in his bed after the allegations first surfaced in 1993, but I think Michael never matured beyond the age of 10, which is why he loved sleepovers, climbing trees, experimenting with "Jesus Juice", etc. He was abused as a child, then coddled as an adult, then numbed out by powerful drugs towards the end of his life. He never really had anything even close to normalcy, which is very sad.

What he did have, was amazing talent. As a singer, songwriter, dancer, all-around entertainer, I mean, the guy was unparalleled in his time. That is what I will remember the most about Michael, but man he sure gave us a bunch to chew on didn't he? I grew up enjoying his music and videos, then was shocked by the freak show aspect that came with his fame, was horrified by his physical deterioration, and finally, I was riveted by his legal travails. Like I said, he was an all-around entertainer! May he rest in the peace he so richly deserves.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Palin not under fire from the feds?


So says the L.A. Times. So WTF? Is she really planning to run for President? On what record?

On 2.5 years of experience as the Governor of a cash-flush state with no real problems?


If the economy is still shitty and unemployment is over 10% when 2012 comes around, there's no doubt Obama will be vulnerable. But no way in hell voters would gamble our future on another charismatic politician w/ a flimsy resume. Mitt "I fix businesses" Romney would be the smart choice to take on Obama if that is the case.

On her Jerry Springer-ish "family values"?


Bill Clinton's seedy personal history had to be in the back of some primary voters minds when choosing between Obama and my candidate of choice, Hillary Clinton. Would voters choose to quadruple down on First Family Drama by housing the freak-show Palin brood at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue? Fuck no!

On her flimsy education and even flimsier intellect?


Voters are in no mood for another retard republican president so soon after Dumbya.....

On her tits and legs?


They can't stay that nice and firm forever!

So what's left for Sarah? Fox News? A reality show to follow Octo-Mom's? Ooooh how about a politcal edition of "The Surreal Life"?! Sarah, Todd and Bristol Palin thrown in a house with Eliot Spitzer, David Vitter, Mark Foley, Mark Sanford, Barney Frank, John Ensign, Larry Craig, Jim McGreevey, Rod Blagojevich and an assorted mix of prostitutes, interns, Argentinian sluts, gay staffers, Ponzi schemers, bathroom stalls and adult diapers!

Friday, July 3, 2009

see ya, Simple Sarah!


Will we see you and Todd in handcuffs soon over your shady housing deal?! What a shocking turn of events! I mean, you were the biggest star of your dying party, the very epitome of the ignorance and intolerance of the dead-enders who make up what's left of the G.O.P.! You had a great shot at the nomination in 2012, before you get too old to give the erectile dysfunctional-Rush Limbaugh crowd the boners their now-supersized wives can no longer give them! You blew it, girl!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Why Bernie Madoff, not Rush Limbaugh, should be made the face of the G.O.P.

The simplest breakdown of America's 2 major political parties is this: The Republicans blame the poor for all our problems, while the Democrats blame the rich. When the poor are seen by the public-at-large as the culprits, the Repubs do well, like in 1994 when "welfare queens" got all the blame for our economic ills. Right now the Democrats are coming off of 2 straight electoral ass-whoopings and are enjoying a huge identification advantage over the G.O.P. Why? Well, George W. Bush for one. Also, there are now more poor people than rich people, and that super rich Ponzi-scheming bastard Bernie Madoff is Public Enemy #1.

Look, as long as that fat fuck Limbaugh is still breathing he'll be saying stupid shit, that's not news. So Operation Rushbo may be a success so far for President Obama, but as long as the face of this financial crisis is a super-rich crook like Madoff, the rich will be (rightly) blamed for this recession and the Democrats will be sitting pretty.

Monday, March 9, 2009

oh thank god! religions losing influence in the U.S.

The mind-fuck that is religion is losing influence in America, so says a nearly year-long study of 55,000 Americans. Some interesting findings:

"Fifteen percent of respondents said they had no religion, an increase from 14.2 percent in 2001 and 8.2 percent in 1990, according to the American Religious Identification Survey."


That is great, but that growth has slowed since that 6 point jump from 1990-2001. Pretty odd, considering that since that time we have had the Catholic Church pedophilia scandal and the 9/11 attacks, and if those haven't made you question the corruption and extremism borne out of religion nothing will. It's a sham, all of it! It also just gives people a handy excuse for their bigotry (hello, Prop. 8!).

"Catholics grew to about one-third of the adult population in California and Texas, and one-quarter of Floridians, largely due to Latino immigration, according to the research."


no surprise here. us latinos are a stubborn and superstitious bunch.

"And, since 1990, a slightly greater share of respondents — 1.2 percent — said they were part of new religious movements, including Scientology, Wicca and Santeria."


I had no idea Scientologists were so small a denomination. Are they all in Hollywood?

"The study found that the percentage of Americans who identified themselves as Muslim grew to 0.6 percent of the population, while growth in Eastern religions such as Buddhism slightly slowed."


wtf? the super-violent religion that is Islam grew substantially while the super-peaceful religion that is Buddhism did not? if you need any more evidence we live in a fucked up, upside-down world....

"the study found that the numbers of Americans with no religion rose in every state."


God Bless America!

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

The Blair Douchebag Project

Seems a fringe student group at NYU decided to "occupy" a campus cafeteria in order to combat capitalist tyranny, errr, or something. Watch the final hilarious minutes here as some idiot protester (who doesn't even go to NYU haha) tapes the cops simply walking through the barricades and telling them them to get the fuck out! Way to take a stand against "The Man", fellas. Sit back, take a sip of some "corporate water" and enjoy this priceless comedy gem:


Ha! Tiananman Square it's not!

Friday, February 13, 2009

Speaking of Mickey Rourke, looks like he got a titty-twister.....

uh, make that this broad with the twisted-up tits:



Let's see, Mickey has a history of depression, drug abuse, carrying firearms, self-destruction and is now dating Courtney Love.....

What could go wrong?

Monday, February 9, 2009

Chris Brown bites

uh, bites Rhianna, that is.....

fucking scumbag thug! what do you wanna bet in the end he gets off easier than Michael Phelps!?!?!? I mean, already Brown's Wrigley's gum ad campaign only got suspended, as opposed to Kelloggs completely dropping Phelps last week!

A bong rip gets you fired, but beating your girlfriend to a bloody pulp only gets you suspended. Nice priorities, America.....

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Really?!

If you haven't seen this already, Seth Meyers rips on the stupidity of Kelloggs for dropping Michael Phelps and dipshit parents upset that a "role model" for their snot-nosed brats is a pothead:

 
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